The house is noticeably
quiet today, disturbingly actually. The twins have gone off to
"Camp". I assume it's scouts’ camp but after their school report
about the infamous "man-hunting", I am now quite concerned that
perhaps they have joined some insurgency vigilante group to hone their skills
in bloodshed. Still, they disappeared down the hill and as I watched
their identical frames recede into the distance, I heard the affectionate name
they call one another echo in the wind -"Cock!" and then I knew they
would be just fine.
Yep. My adorable ‘identikits’like
to swear like sailors much to my
dismay. First thing in the morning to
last thing at night. Their chosen profanities seem to revolve around
their genitalia. Banging on their door in the morning to get them up for
school provokes a response of, "Knob!” Sometimes with an added dairy
product of “-cheese!"; handing them tea in the evening gains me a:
"What's this bollocks?" and their favourite curse to any suggestion
of school work or household chore is: "Balls!"
The
need to constantly refer to their privates confuses me. Are they just mentally
checking that their penis and testicles are still attached or believe constant
reference to them constantly will prevent them dropping off? Anyway, for
a week I will be two "members" of the family down.
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